*looks at clock*

so it's the middle of the night and I can't sleep... I'm in the office trying to be quiet while the husband is deeply snoozing away in the other room (at least, I hope he is - I mean, one of us should be getting some rest!). it's been a pretty full week so far. I got up early Monday to drive to Dallas and work all day Monday and Tuesday, finishing the last episodes of one of the shows I lend my voice to. my character in that one just happens to be sort of an undead assassin... family killed when she was young, then she killed, herself, the great resentment of it all 'bringing her back' from the dead and giving her supernatural powers to annihilate evil, pip pip cheerio all in a day's work. notably, she does a lot of yelling, blood-curdling cries while attacking and being attacked. I was hoarse by Monday evening, and finally got back into town Tuesday night. yesterday was largely spent narrating 5 hours worth of pre-calculus e-learning courses, and by the time I left the studio my voice was waaay fatigued and my throat felt like it was swelling up. far be it from me to complain about work, but it's so much more taxing when you don't feel 100%. I feel like I have to 'work' so much harder both physically and mentally to push through.

I'd gotten a call from my aunt earlier in the day saying that she needed a piece narrated/recorded for Houston's Birthday Gala at the GRB, so I drove straight there to knock it out. as it happens, the recording equipment wasn't optimal, so I'll be reading/performing the three pages live onstage. tonight, Thursday. I haven't been in front of a live audience like that in so long, and I confess that while I'm a bit nervous I'm honestly pretty excited to do it. I'm mostly hoping that I don't catch a heel on something and plummet to the floor, and I need to rehearse the piece some more so my head isn't buried in the script the whole time. my almost 15-year old kitty is going in for surgery this morning, too, to remove a lump that's getting in the way, and I'm pretty sure my sleeplessness is due to trying to work this day out in my head... drop off kitty, work on script, format it and sheet protect it and buy a cheap black notebook to hold it, head to an audition at 1p, one more chapter of pre-cal afterward, rehearsal at the GRB at 4, 6:30 call time for the Gala. pick up the cat somewhere in there and get her home, clean up all pretty-like, and co-ordinate with hubs so he can join me at our table at the Gala.

I have to laugh, because you just never know what opportunities God is going to drop in your lap. interacting with a live audience again will be a very good exercise for me, I'm sure, and that it's happening when I'm not feeling my absolute best is another exercise of sorts. it's not THAT crazy a day, really. everything will be fine, and I'm sure I'll mostly just have to police my attitude. that and try to overcome the fact that I'll be tired because I COULDN'T SLEEP TONIGHT. sheesh, it's really dumb. maybe I'll be able to go catch a couple of hours now that I've written it all down.

another thing, yesterday I turned six in twelve step years. one of the things I secretly feared for a long time is that I wouldn't know how to 'perform' live anymore, or that it would be so colossally different that I'd realize my mojo was somehow lost along with the other changes I've made in my life. this will be a really nice chance to dip my toe into the water of give-and-take with an audience again, and I don't even have to memorize anything. thank you, Father.