catch up day.

Because we are often running to and fro 'doing stuff' and showing up for our obligations, and I'm in and out of town so often lately, 'catch up' days are a lovely, luxurious phenomenon.  The husband has been delivered to the airport to go to work in New Orleans today, and here I sit in my office watching the BBC channel, drinking a home-made latte, and formulating a game plan for the rest of the day.  Some things that need to happen:

Organizing the Pile - a fairly frequent activity involving sorting and addressing the stack of papers and receipts on my desk.  

Email my agent about a billing discrepancy I've discovered.  sigh.  Update and reconcile more billing.

Attending to the Road Warrior - I live out of my car sometimes.  And have been driving around loaded down with trash bags full of garage sale items in them for two months now.  I'm emptying the car and giving everything a good disinfecting.  She is a good, paid-for, trusty friend and I want to keep taking good care of her.

Nap.  =)

Jump back into reading The Shack.  I just learned of the powerful experience a friend had reading it, and I have a feeling the words will take on new life now.

Think of something to make my traveller husband for dinner.

********************

Parting thoughts:

We had friends over last night.  How wonderful to host people in our home.  M and I both love to serve in that way.

An oven-baked sweet potato with a bit of butter is a fantastic breakfast.

A second cousin of mine feeds her baby real food like mashed up sweet potatoes, avocado, steamed carrots, etc.  Really, they don't buy baby food.  I love that idea.

Vegetables are so amazing.  I would like to have a real garden someday.

My sweet Daddy had knee surgery and has to spend more time recovering and off his knee than he originally thought.  Hard for a man with so much to attend to, and who loves his business.  Be good and take care of yourself, Daddy.  I love you and that lady you live with.  When we come up for the 60th anniversary party M wants to stop at a Texas Monthy 'Best BBQ' pick and bring you some brisket.   

I dreamt of my niece last night.  I was holding her and dancing around, and she was totally smart and talking in complete sentences.  How can I coerce Southwest into flying to Abilene?

The Pile awaits.  Lord God, please protect M today.  *boom!  he just texted that he's on the ground in NO.  woot!  thank you!*

one tap dancer with a funky beat, please.

I feel the need to chronicle our recent live music experiences...


first up, Her Space Holiday:

a friend introduced me to this guy's album "The Young Machines", and I loved it.  LOVED IT.  it's electronic and beat-y and like reading someone's private journal... sort of rambly and kind of raw.  when we first got to the venue, he was standing by the merch table selling the opening bands' stuff, and I wigged out a bit.  I wish I'd had the presence of mind to walk over and just say "hey, I really like your music.  I like how you express yourself and the honesty I feel in your songs and that bit at the end of 'From South Carolina'? Yeah, whenever I hear the music swell I imagine the end of an epic movie about Liliputians and the whole kingdom is all dancing and waving."  (which is true... that's what it makes me think of.) but I totally chickened out.  it wasn't a starstruck thing... hm, it's hard to explain what I mean.  see, I sometimes have people who come up and tell me how they like some of the characters I play or a commercial I did, and it's all very nice and flattering most of the time, and sometimes it's not what I want to think about or I don't feel like making small talk about it. and I just didn't want to be that girl that night with the HSH guy whose name I can't remember.  make any sense?  probably not, right - I mean, if the guy didn't want to interact with fans he probably wouldn't have been helming the merch table.  anyway, I really liked seeing him live and singing along, even if he was backed by a band and not rocking a laptop.




oh, I also like his other, more hopeful-sounding incarnation as xoxo, panda (especially the sleepy tigers song!)...

and last Friday, we hit Tilly and the Wall:

my first exposure to them was this song on a mix cd my husband made me when we first started dating. this was a fun, fun show and I got to bring home a T&TW tote bag.  woo-hoo!  if you look closely at the next photo, you can see the tap dancer up behind them all... rad! I wanna tap dance!


so now that I've mentioned the mix cd, I want to tell that story.  M and I had been hanging out for a week or so, and I honestly couldn't tell if we were going anywhere or not.  which was very disconcerting for me.  who might have a control issue or two.  one night, we agreed to meet at Empire Cafe for dinner, and he said he had something for me.  I don't think he gave it to me until we were almost done eating - anyway, he had made a cover featuring sharks from a National Geographic magazine with the caption "Shark Repellent: Music to Clear the Waters".  this was awesome because A) at some point I had mentioned that I was scared of sharks and, for awhile, they appeared in all of my bad dreams and even weirdly showed up in real life at inopportune times (*an old boyfriend actually broke up with me at an aquarium years ago with a shark lazily swimming behind his head.  if that doesn't put the freak in freaky I don't know what does.*), and this was proof that he actually listened when I talked and B) while a sharpie scribbled on a cd does the job, he showed real creativity and extra effort, which was just... well, flattering.  even the cd inside had a watery label on it!  the artists I remember the most from the playlist were the Annuals (opened), REM, Tapes n' Tapes, the Mountain Goats, the Pipettes, Neutral Milk Hotel, Nanci Griffith, Depeche Mode (closed), Hello Saferide, Against Me!, the Flaming Lips, and, of course, T&TW... there were others, too, but my memory is hazy right now and I don't want to cheat and look in itunes.  the point is that I am a sucker for a good mix cd.  and I loved it.  I ended up making one for him, too - my cover featured pictures of places we went/walked on our first date.  I don't really know that he loved or even liked most of the songs, but when I think about those cds now I see them as the hopeful and quiet risk of making of something personal and unique for someone new - when you're already in your 30's with water running under your bridges and a much warier eye - still, choosing to make this carefully crafted offering and put it out there for a person you met on the set of JB's short film last month to do with what they will.  Here are our album covers:

pretty sweet, huh?

oh, and p.s. :  on another walk 11 months later, just outside the Rothko Chapel (pictured above on the cd cover), on a patch of ground where once stood the white, ice-sculpture-y-looking thing also pictured above, bottom middle (which was actually an interactive art piece you could walk around in and touch)...

my husband proposed to me. 

*smile*

LaLa Land...

when I stepped outside the terminal at Intercontinental and into the humidity of Houston Sunday night, I breathed an audible sigh of relief.  I enjoy visiting other cities... some of them, I could even sort of see myself living in... like Chicago.  Yay to that city and it's public transportation!  L.A.... I don't want to live there.  which is ok, because I'm sure the it's citizens feel that it's crowded enough as it is and there are already enough cars vying for public parking.  the trip up the PCH to Zuma Beach WAS gorgeous, though, and though I teased him about it the new Sigur Ros album my husband was playing was a great soundtrack:

so maybe it's not as pretty here, or as climate-friendly, or as celeb-happy... and our mannequins haven't had boob jobs (??!!@!?)...

but Texas is home and I love it.  I think the Hubby and I will head to Galveston soon for a little red-headed stepchild beach action. =)

liberal shmiberal.

I've been trolling around reading some viewer's opinions of Wall*E.  The other day the husband I watched a snippet of some "news" channel opining about the liberal bias of the movie and blasting Pixar...

I get that it takes all types, that people are different, that art is subjective.

I know that some people listen to conservative talk radio and really like it, and will even go so far as to buy a ticket to Glen Beck's Comedy Tour.  *shudder*  (to clarify: I don't hate talk radio. I love talk radio! It can make long drives a better experience. However, since I've grown more and more sensitive to general meanness (see my 112) and etremism, I can't stomach a lot of things anymore. Wus!)

having said all that... it's disappointing.   

to begin:  I am sick, disgusted, that if a movie, a book, an art piece, a club, a PERSON has something to say about the planet, or dares to suggest that humans might take a look at our consumption, our stewardship of what we've been given, it/they must have some evil liberal bias and a scratched copy of Al Gore's documentary.  It is so completely ridiculous to me.  As a person of faith, I find that issues of stewardship are at the heart of a lot of what I choose to do and how I live.  Likewise, the planet and all of it's resources that impact our lives and those of our food sources/neighboring countries fall under the same 'stewardship' heading in the column in my head, and while I don't have a lot of answers I bristle at the labels thrown around.  I didn't feel *preached to* during the movie as some apparently did... granted, the setting is clearly in a world that humans junked up and left to be cleaned up by robots, but how offended can we really be?? Come on now.  You know what you've put out on the curb.  I know what I have, and it's sort of gross!  Does learning about recycling kill me, insult me, or mean I can't concurrently believe in (ethical) capitalism? Does the movie's portrayal of humans, mostly inactive for the past 700 years, as fat people hooked on meals they can sip in a cup offend me?  Um, let's go walk around the Galleria a bit and do a little people-watching...

*tangential thought... Wall*E aside, I may be predisposed to like a little 'preach' in my product.  That's totally why I love books like Little Women, The Chronicles of Narnia... there is something in my psyche that wants something of substance, of quality, of a prod toward a better way... or even just a good old fashioned struggle of conscience and right/wrong.  I think moral lessons and thought-provoking concepts are so much of what art is all about, in my mind. That and the summer blockbuster, duh.  As one person on the Marquee Blog so succinctly put it, "Hey, I get it, we need to take care of the planet. Thanks. Memo read. Next time I shell out $20 for the movie, please entertain me...."*

 

I am also more than a little annoyed at the reaction of some adults toward the movie, who seem to think that if a feature is animated it intrinsically must, by default, be full of bright colors and capture the attention of their 3 year old or it's failed it's duty.  This is a very good, creative company - they made Finding Nemo and the Toy Stories.  They made The Incredibles.  They made Cars and Monsters, Inc, and Ratatouille.  If you look across their body of work so far, they've shown a lot of range, and they take some risks.  I haven't loved everything they've put out, but I have a ton of respect for them.  They don't go for the kid ticket every time and they continue to push the envelope when it comes to animation... did you SEE Ratatouille??!  But what really gets me the most, I think, is the complaint of having very little dialogue for the first 40 minutes of the film (a fact much publicized, so it shouldn't be a surprise to anyone).  For those old enough to know better... again, come on.  This just cements in my mind that everyone is growing more and more ADD.  Bah.  And for those parents who, for whatever reason, chose to take their 2 year old to this movie - though a cursory online search would've most likely led you to conclude it might not be the best flick for them - keep taking your kids to Kung Fu Panda or this horrible-looking Chihuahua movie, where everything is broad and entertaining.  Leave the rest of us in the dark staring at the outer-space robot ballet onscreen, thankful for artistry and, if not enamored of the product, at least appreciative of the quality and risk the company took in doing something new.  In my opinion - which is, I'm sure, equally myopic and meaningless - it's like accusing crunchy bruschetta of not being enough triscuits and squeezy cheese.  the red stuff tasted too much like tomatoes and I wasn't expecting it - where was the cheese in a can that I don't even need a cracker for I can just squeeze it in my mouth!? 

or something.

(for the record, I think there's a place for both triscuits and cheese in a can AND bruschetta.  I will merely, humbly point out, for the record, that one requires more care and concentration to make.)

*whisper*

thank you, Lord, for the gift you gave me last night.  it was so good to feel you again.

wall*E

We saw this lovely film this weekend... it was so good!  Go see it, and marvel at how an animated movie out story-tells a lot of what gets released nowadays... Pixar is a remarkable company.

(and here's a great review my husband found that is spoiler free)

bleeding love

so my husband and I are fans of So You Think You Can Dance...

and we were both so moved by this performance by Chelsie and Mark that we downloaded the song, kept thinking about the routine through the weekend, and here I am posting a link to it.  

112

I got this idea from write softly, who got it from some of the blogs she visits...

112 Things

1.  Unless I'm at the beach, I don't like to feel things sticking to my feet.

2.  I could have my feet and shoulders rubbed every day and never tire of it. (and honestly feel like they needed working out.)

3.  I'm prone to feel cold, so I've almost always got a sweater or cardigan with me.

4.  If you see me wearing a baseball cap, chances are I really didn't feel like brushing my hair.

5.  The older I get, the less makeup I feel like putting on.

6.  The older I get, the more I want to love my body the way it is.

7.  The older I get, the guiltier I feel for lacking discipline.

8.  My left earlobe is almost ripped through from where someone in second grade accidentally snagged my earring.  It didn't hurt.

9.  I pierced my ear again myself just to the right of the prior hole, now ripped.

10.  I rarely wear earrings any more at all.  But I do like necklaces.

11.  The BBC channel makes me think that, based on their vocabulary, working/lower-class English people sound more educated than most Americans.

12.  I used to take great pride in my vocabulary... I figured it was the result of reading a lot.

13.  I don't read as much any more.  Has my vocabulary suffered?  Yep.

14.  I like the reliability of 'cause and effect'.

15.  I am usually running late because I try to squeeze in too many things into periods of time... I read somewhere that it is a trait of perfectionism.

16.  I was in Cinderella Girl beauty pageants from ages 3 to 9.

17.  I rebel against any 'what's your favorite ________?' questions... it makes me feel pigeonholed, and very few things ever remain my favorite anything.

18.  I didn't think I had much of a sweet tooth until I quit drinking almost 5 years ago.  Now I crave sweets.

19.  I'm very dependent on technology to entertain me... someone needs to go play outside...

20.  I sometimes play on the Iphone when I'm supposed to be working in the studio.

21.  I do it because I'm bored, and I'd rather read the adventures of Pioneer Woman than think about how many more hours and days I have to read and scream words.

22.  My very first concert was Matthew Sweet at the Varsity in Baton Rouge.

23.  I love blue jeans.

24.  I'm learning to like to cook again.

25.  I love driving a paid-for car.

26.  I have a fairly changeable nature.

27.  I like to have control over my life.

28.  I believe in naps.

29.  I love my family.  and my church family.  and my Saturday night family.

30.  When I'm watching something scary or awkward, I reflexively put my fingers in my ears... if I can't hear it, it's not as bad...?

31.  There are days I can't believe I'm a homeowner.

32.  There are days I don't want to do anything... and because I'm self-employed, I don't have to.

33.  Sometimes I wonder if I'm depressed.  and then I figure most people are, every now and then, so who cares?

34.  I believe that MY 'depression' would probably be cured with a better diet and a good workout.  Cause-effect.

35.  I love carbs.  I could marry the potato.

36.  I don't put toothpaste directly onto the toothbrush... I squeeze it onto my finger, put in in my mouth, wet the toothbrush, and start brushing.  I have no idea why.

37.  I don't like things in water to swirl around my legs if I can't see them.

38.  I have horrible guilt because, while attempting to snorkel in Hawaii, my mask kept leaking water and I panicked and stepped all over the coral.

39.  I believe that God is big enough to handle everything... even my honest questions and limited understanding.

40.  I would like to be a better ambassador for Him in the world.

41.  I sometimes feel on the other side of the glass from some contemporary religious language... I'm sure it's heartfelt, but it sounds hokey to me and I don't relate well to it.

42.  I love to light lamps, candles, and incense.

43.  I'm a little shocked at how much money I used to spend on clothes.

44.  I like the kitchen to be very clean.

45.  The feel of soft, cool sheets with a ceiling fan going overhead is a beautiful thing.

46.  I like the feeling of accomplishment.

47.  I can be touchy about receiving criticism.

48.  I believe that natural light makes everything look better.

49.  I have been on sets and had my hair/makeup done many times... and, hands down, I look best when I do my own.

50.  I don't like a lot of product in my hair.

51.  I sometimes don't begin or attempt something because I can't do it 'right' or I'm not sure how to start... another sign of perfectionism.

52.  I think I've made better friends with my inner critic.

53.  I believe that God practically teaches me about how He loves me through my husband.

54.  I need to learn practical lessons, still.

55.  I sometimes want to hide away and disappear for awhile... hibernate.

56.  It feels good and rejuvenating to spend time alone like that.

57.  I think the term 'flushed with anger' is very appropriate for that feeling.

58.  I don't like meanness at all, really.

59.  I don't like sarcasm a lot, either, unless it's somehow communicated without contempt and ego.

60.  I do believe that making fun of people, even in jest, is often veiled hostility or compensation.

61.  'Why are fried foods so good?!' is a question the adult and child in me will always tug over.

62.  I hope we never own a Fry Daddy.

63.  The consistency of meat sometimes grosses me out.

64.  Diet Pepsi tastes like mold to me.

65.  I make really good soups.

66.  I don't enjoy depending on other people to accomplish things.

67.  My favorite Bible for years was the Thompson Chain Reference NIV I got at Heart o' Texas Bible Camp for winning the Marvin Awalt Bible Award.

68.  My husband got me a butter-yellow, leather NIV as a wedding gift with my new name engraved on the front.  So now it's my new favorite.  (but I'll still reference the Thompson Chain for the good notes)

69.  I love baths.

70.  and great socks.

71.  If left unchecked, my addictive tendencies can lead me to consume way too much coffee, and then I feel CRAZY.

72.  I think my stage-acting career peaked in graduate school when we performed 'Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?' at the John F. Kennedy Center.

73.  There are days I think of chucking the whole acting profession.

74.  Acting is one of the few things that's come completely naturally to me.

75.  I don't, however, think it defines me.

76.  I'm glad I've been able to make a good living with it.

77.  I look forward to having a baby or two soon.

78.  I have no idea what that will do to my job.

79.  I hope we're in a position to not care too much.

80.  When it comes to headphones, I have to go old school, over the head.  The little things that are supposed to stick into your ears hurt mine and fall out.

81.  Though I will always love the country and want to get away to it, I love living IN the city... and yeah, I think it's a good place to raise kids.

82.  Sometimes, when I make purchases, I fret over what others will think about it and what it 'says' about me.

83.  The macbook was one of the best purchases I ever made.

84.  I do think apple products are superior to PC... even the packaging is cool!

85.  When I cook, I like to use as few pots and pans as possible.  I don't want a lot of clean up.

86.  I am anxious about my dog at the dogpark, around kids, when he barks at neighbors, etc.  I love him and he's a really good kid, but I never forget that he's an animal that could hurt or annoy someone else.

87.  the Louisa May Alcott books never get old for me.

88.  Getting LASIK was one of the most amazing, quality-of-life changes that I've ever experienced.

89.  I've recently discovered that I tend to like to receive information - preaching, financial teaching, guidance, etc. - from fatherly-type, sometime-tough-love-plain-speaking men with a softy-gentle streak.

90.  I don't like the pigeonholing aspect of party politics... i.e., you think thus and such so you must be a _______, which means this list of generalities and disqualifies you from being a __________ with it's own list of generalities.

91.  I have a tendency to apologize or offer a disclaimer before voicing an opinion... "I'm sorry, I don't know anything about anything, but I read about this thing and this is what I thought..."

92.  I love that my husband calls me out on it and tells me I'm smart and that it's okay to say what I think.

93.  I honestly think, no matter what I did, he would still love me.

94.  That's God teaching me through him, again.

95.  I can be rather morbid, and wonder if I'm spending my life well.

96.  I sometimes have anxiety attacks when I'm driving.

97.  Podcasts and books on cd make long car rides bearable for me.

98.  I sometimes drive in silence, too.

99.  I misspelled my own name on our wedding invitations.

100.  I understand why people elope.

101.  There is a book in me... I just don't know how to get it out.  (that was figurative, btw)

102.  Things that are gross to me:  big globs of mayo, cottage cheese, slimy tomatoes, bread that is soggy from ketchup, wet lettuce, or slimy tomatoes, liver, meat that looks like it's bleeding, crunchy onions in my smooth bean burrito, tendon and other unidentified things in my pho.

103.  Items of makeup I actually use most days:  powder, mascara, lip balm.

104.  and lotion!  Must have moisturizer and sunblock!

105.  I would like to be more green... I'm surprised at how tricky recycling still is.

106.  I don't live in the past.  And that is a relief.

107.  I used to take pride in being primarily self-sufficient.

108.  I believe it is good for people to know how to take care of and support themselves.

109.  ... while still having community around them for support, accountability, and growth.  We aren't meant to be islands.

110.  I believe that boundaries are something you keep learning all your life.

111.  I'm sad that this cup of coffee is almost gone.

112.  This list was tougher than I thought it would be... and I wonder what key to my personality I left out.