the great thaw... and other random biznizz.

the 'great thaw' is what's happening to my insides right now. I feel parts of myself softening up and letting go, or coming alive again. yesterday, I spent some time digging up old cds of artists I started listening to nine or ten years ago, when my life started getting turned upside down in the Good Way. I was dating a guy who took me to metro bible study at first baptist church, where I was introduced to various Christian artists like Ginny Owens, Watermark, Bebo Norman, the David Crowder Band, and Nichole Nordeman. it felt a little awkward at the time, because of my propensity to be cheezed out by contemporary, mushy Christian-singing-or-speak (something that still comes up), but the things they were talking about were so right on and needed... I definitely responded to the message of grace, forgiveness, and the transforming call to thankful holiness in the inner parts. neither metro nor the guy were ultimately meant to be lasting for me, but my somewhat starving faith was whetted and my spirit began aching for a place to belong and work itself out. I started to look for a church home of my own, and that's how I ended up with my family at SWC. this is a video someone made to a N. Nordeman song that I listened to over and over back then:



I'm not sure how the hardness, or whatever it is, grew up over parts of me during the past few years. the effects are easier to see... less depth in the things I've fed myself, less prayer, more fear and anger, less worship, less seeking to know God, less creativity and expression of love, less grace for others, and awkward prioritizing. everybody has their mountaintop experiences and valleys, I know, but as I find myself scaling the side of the a cliff again I'm reminded of how much more right this feels, to feel compelled to reach for something higher.

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I'm finding myself becoming more and more respectful of the plight of farmers in our country as I continue to work my way through B. Kingsolver's Animal, Vegetable, Miracle. man, the work it takes to grow a big garden! I look forward to more hands-on learning in our future. one of the most apparent changes in my attitude continues to be a watchfulness for local produce and such, wanting to support the Texas agri-industry. I've been buying Lactaid for years - not that I know I'm lactose-intolerant, but I had a bad experience with a bowl of cereal on a hot day years ago, and since I don't drink a lot of milk anyway I just went with Lactaid and it stuck. this was the Texas milk option we found that also happens to be growth-hormone free and all, and so far I think we're happy with the switch.

I also baked up some eggplant fries last night, my desire for more of the vegetable fueled by ms. mcD's yummy eggplant parmesan - or is it parmigiana? - the other night. if you like eggplant, by all means give this a try as a fun snack or side. I just peeled and sliced up the eggplant, threw them on a baking sheet with some olive oil, salt and pepper, and baked away, flipping them halfway. I was experimenting a bit, but I think 400 degrees for about 30 -35 minutes should do the trick... ours were better when they cooked longer, 'til they were getting just a little crispy around the edges. tasty, no lie, and high in fiber!

there's a head of local cabbage in the 'fridge that I'm currently eyeing... what to do with you, cabbage-head... (kids in the hall reference, anyone?)

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I got the results back from my yearly physical, and am happy to know that the numbers show a physically healthy person. I won't lie, I would like to look a little different, but that's this year's goal - not to 'weigh less', but to move my body more. my eating isn't out of control, I just have a pretty sedentary life currently. even my work involves a lot of sitting for long periods of time, and the clues all point to my metabolism slowing down a little as I'm awesomely advancing in years. so, that means I need to move my bootie.

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I sometimes just delete the daily reflections that come to my inbox without even reading them, but I opened today's and thought, 'right on!'.

WHERE DID I GET THE IDEA that worship must always be restrained, quiet, and dignified?
Throughout my long life, you have showered me with blessing upon blessing.
Today I will not withhold the praise you deserve.
Awaken the passion that I’ve kept tucked away for a rainy day.
It’s all about you, Lord. Not me — but you.
Before I get out of this chair, I will lift my hands and say aloud the Lord’s Prayer.
Today I will consider what all those words mean.
I will sing a hymn of praise while I comb my hair and put on my socks.
I will not wait for another day.
I will make a joyful noise!

- Missy Buchanan
Living with Purpose in a Worn-Out Body

From pp. 19-20 of Living with Purpose in a Worn-Out Body by Missy Buchanan. Copyright © 2008 by the author. All Rights Reserved. Used with permission of Upper Room Books.

to whoever's reading this... I wish good things for you today.

-m.y.