disappointing.

they passed it. sinking feeling in stomach.

look, I don't want our economy to tank further. I don't want people to lose their jobs, homes, or retirements. do I want the bailout to work? Um, I guess... it stands to help out SOME, if stars align and you squint at it hard enough, but the unknowns are huge here. that's it... we just don't know, but the American people will incur the tab regardless of the outcome. I feel this is an awful piece of legislation that, I am convinced, will not 'save' our economy or our global economic standing... just prolong the inevitable implosion of our dependance on questionable credit structures and give our government a new national identity and role, which is scary to me. hey, mr. paulson, didn't your last company go down the tubes?? not only is the bill bad fundamentally, but now there's an even bigger price tag for your tax dollars to cover, made up of ridiculous and expensive add-ons to buy our representative's support of this flawed 'plan'. and our two leading Presidential candidates both voted for it. and can talk about tax cuts with a straight face. there is small hope that those who can will attempt to whittle away at this barnacled Titanic in upcoming sessions...

I suppose my value system cries for our government to band together to be the 'Dad You Need'... at least, as I would define that. the Reformed Dad in a morality play might say.. 'yes, kids, I know I said you could go to Disneyland, and I've raised you to believe that it's the birthright of every family and person to go to Disneyland regardless of their circumstance, and I raised you thinking we were rich and could afford whatever we or you want, but your mom and I - both through the decisions we've made and the decisions we haven't - have run this family into the ground, and we don't have any money. not only to we not have any money, but we're so in the hole and indebted we may have to sell our house and our cars and your game systems and go live with relatives and wait tables on weekends and buy generic when we actually do buy something new. if we can't turn it around and dig out of the hole, we won't be able to buy you a car or send you to college, and you should know that Christmas won't look the same. we may even have to ask you to go to work to help out - which, as your Dad who was supposed to manage things better, shames me. I'm trying to learn my lesson... I'm taking classes and I'm in counseling to learn to do a better job with life, because I'm responsible as the leader of this family. I'm sorry if this hurts your sense of self, and I'm sorry for depriving you of these things we'd like you to have... but we think there's greater value and integrity in addressing the truth of our situation now, in hopes that you will learn to be much wiser than we are and not put your family at risk the way we have."

Non-Reformed Dad, in the morality play, would just go to Wachovia- sorry, Wells Fargo - and take out a HELOC to send the family not only to Disneyland, but Aspen for Christmas! and then, of course, in the end we see what was gained or lost as we look in on the children of both families in thirty years...

would I feel differently if I were losing my job? if $100,000 were wiped out of my retirement funds yesterday? I'm sure I'd feel more conflicted. and angry. let's face it, it sucks to be the child of the Reformed Dad whose finally facing the music and crashing your dream of how things are supposed to be.

I don't mean to be simplistic, or a jerk, or extreme, or unfeeling toward anyone in crisis. and I don't mean to imply there's some sort of other magical solution immediately apparent... though I do believe more tiered and foundational progress could be achieved if our appointed math nerds were free to think outside of survival and political pressure. Robert Johnson, the former chief economist of the Senate Banking Committee, was on Democracy Now! this morning, and confessed that as much as he hates the bill, he'd probably feel compelled to vote 'Y' for it because of the inescapable need to do something immediate, but that it made him nauseous. it's gross, all the way around.



p.s. I believe our Congress thinks the majority of Americans are both uninformed and powerless. I know how both of my state reps voted on this bill. I look forward to November.