so this was the opening song on one of my favorite albums ever by The Postal Service...
seriously, this cd lived in the player in my car for a loooooong time.
other miscellany:
we went to the doctor today for the nuchal translucency test, which is essentially a chromosome test that's told in ratios... they take pictures of the baby in certain positions to measure an area behind it's neck, draw my blood, and factor in my age and come out with a ratio of how likely our baby is to have a chromosomal disorder. it's very non-invasive and is meant, if the results are satisfactory to the doctor and patient, to keep you from getting an amniocentesis (which carries more risk). when the technician started the sonogram the baby was sleeping there, all curled up and comfortable, so she started jiggling it around to make it move. it took awhile (heavy sleeper??), but finally as she was dragging the whatever-it-is across my abdomen the baby bucked like, 'whoa, okay fine!'. it was kicking like a little ninja with it's little skinny legs, it's little hands were stretching and moving around, and then it did a flip and ended up on it's head facing the other way. how fun to see that! and what a wild thing to not feel it at all! our doctor was pleased with how everything looks, and we're headed back in 3 weeks (we should get the results of the test in about a week). if anyone is counting, I've gained about 4-5 pounds so far, which is right on.
have you heard the phrase 'an idle mind is where the devil works'? I think it's true... or maybe I just think we're meant to do something and not lay around all day. I say this because, after our doctor's appointment, M and I came home to just enjoy the rest of the day since we'd gotten our work-work done early, and after watching a couple of X-files episodes, eating lunch, taking a nap, catching up on SYTYCD and an episode of Glee, I felt... bored. not bored really - I actually really don't like for adults to talk about being bored, as though we don't have the power to go do something - I just felt in need of action. cleaning the kitchen and doing some laundry made me a new woman. I guess I like a little accomplishment in my day, it makes me feel better.
as to the question from yesterday... I appreciated the comments, ladies. when it comes to trying to see things from the perspective of others, I suppose it all depends on what our intentions are. I do believe that, on a very basic level, if a person wants to effectively communicate with another person or group of people, learning where they're coming from has obvious benefits both interpersonally and informationally. you simply have a greater chance of being heard and understood and creating a receptive space if there's a bridge of understanding and respect between you. sadly, I think sometimes we decide that the message as-understood-by-me is more important than the hearer. I've been there, and it's not a good feeling. I've also been on the opposite side, where I felt I didn't say enough or wasn't bold enough because I didn't want to offend someone.
from my own experience, I can easily spend my time taking in information and formulating my own beliefs about things and then looking for an outlet or soapbox to express them... for example, my family's always been very open about discussing all manner of things, and debating politics, current issues, and faith has always been a part of our fabric. I'm glad of it and I enjoy the sharpening, but I'm also aware that sometimes my feelings about various topics and the way I want to express them have the potential to get in the way of my respecting and loving others... usually not horribly or hurtfully, but I'm aware of it anyway. I want to be known more for my love, my faith, and my spirit more than my opinions, but that's tough when everything gets so easily intertwined.
our world seems so polarizing now.. it doesn't appear to be very popular to try to lay aside your own opinions and thoughts to try to comprehend that of people you disagree with... or, just lay them aside out of respect and to avoid fruitless argument, when that's the inevitable outcome. maybe to some it might smack of weakness. I see it like this... I have some ideas based on information I have, but I'm guessing I don't have the full picture. others are looking at other puzzle pieces on which they've founded their ideas. it's not weakness to be open to more potential picture, even if what I learn and hear muddies my own water a little and makes me have to re-think. critical thinking is so necessary, especially now that there's so much information and mis-information at our fingertips - we must keep testing and verifying what we learn. I thought of this excerpt from Robert Kiyosaki's book 'Rich Dad Poor Dad', when he's discussing investing in education:
'I love audio tapes. the reason: I can rewind quickly. I was listening to a tape by Peter Lynch, and he said something I completely disagreed with. instead of becoming arrogant and critical, I simply pushed 'rewind' and I listened to that five-minute stretch of tape at least twenty times. possibly more. but suddenly, by keeping my mind open, I understood what he said. it was like magic... I gained tremendous depth and insight into the vast resources of his education and experience. the net result: I still have the old way I used to think, and I have Peter's way of looking at the same problem or situation. I have two thoughts instead of one.'
he goes on to say that the only way to accumulate more information in this way to be humble enough to seek it out or listen to it, and that 'listening is more important that talking'. financial matters are his specialty, but I got a lot out of this book when I read it, oh, three years ago... just pulling it down to look up that quote makes me want to reread it.
not that I think you can't hold personal Truths that are unchanging. I certainly don't believe everything is relative. but in terms of dealing with the rest of the world, the questions for me at the end of the day sound like: 'is how I'm living speaking that Truth? do others get it by how I behave, the words I say? what's really important to me, and am I communicating that?' honestly, parts of me still feel splintered, like there are some areas that are still sort of renegade and reactive, flapping in the wind and not doing anyone much good. but I do know when I hit the Spirit groove, when I feel that I'm operating in the way I'm meant to in my convictions, and the freedom, peace, and control of that place makes me want to conform all of my life to that channel.
thanks for reading... if anyone has more ideas and food for thought, I'd be happy to hear them.
-m.y.
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